Beat the Blues: Simple Ways to Think Positive

Want to be positive always and attract more positivity into your life? Here are the strategies to unlock your inner sunshine by developing positive thoughts:

This morning, my housemaid was very worried. Her owner had asked to vacate the house, and she was not able to find one within her budget. 

My colleague has bought a new car and has many doubts whether it is a good one or if he should have gone for the other brand (actually, he did a detailed study before booking the car!). Maybe he has seen some new cars on the road! 

We had a conference today, and one student who had to present her paper was looking very tense. Will I present it nicely? What if I forget in the middle? What if I do not answer the questions asked?…Full of negative thoughts!

See, in this fast-paced world, how easily we are getting caught in a turmoil of worries, doubts, and negativity.

To live a peaceful life, we need to stop letting worries and negativity control us. Instead, train your mind to be hopeful and believe in yourself, even when things are tough. It’s about finding the good even when it’s hard. I don’t say that you should say I can do it, even if it is not possible in reality. But, you can choose to be optimistic, focusing on solutions, and believing in your ability to handle. 

Why should I be an optimist? What are the benefits of positive thinking? Cultivating a positive mindset can lead to some truly remarkable benefits like Improved Physical Health, Enhanced Mental Well-being, Increased Resilience, Stronger Relationships, and Greater Success. I am not going to detail about these benefits as they are very obvious. Instead I wish to elaborate on planting the seeds of positivity – some practically possible strategies to develop a positive mindset!

The first and foremost step in actively nurturing this inner garden of optimism is being present in the moment, Mindfulness.

This can help you detach from negative thoughts about the past or worries about the future. Practice some mindfulness techniques like deep breathing or mindful observation. At times, I will be carried away by the thoughts, re-living the entire episode of things that happened in the past(mostly, the sad ones which I wish to forget!) or fear of the future. When I notice this, taking a few deep breaths and focusing on the sensation of the breath going in and out can bring me back to the present moment and calm racing thoughts. I suggest you read the article: ‘The Why, What, and How of Mindfulness’ for a detailed discussion on mindfulness. https://spavai.com/the-why-what-and-how-of-mindfulness/ 

To Become Aware of Your Thoughts(Mindful Observation), pay attention to the thoughts that frequently pop into your head. It may not be possible for you to pay attention all the time. Better start with 10 minutes(and increase to 20 minutes to 30 minutes). I used to do this: Sit in a comfortable posture in a quiet place. Close my eyes gently, and 

• Observe my thoughts at this moment, (there will be an underlying desire/feeling or expectation). No Reaction! I just observe!
• Is the feeling or thought that I have at this moment naturally acceptable to me? Am I happy with the feeling that I have at this moment?
• Now, the next question is: Who decided the feeling that I have at this moment? Did I decide it, or did someone else/situation outside decide it? Is it possible for someone else to decide what I have to think now or what feeling I should have now? 
• It is clear that I am only deciding on what to think and feel. If so, on what basis did I decide the feeling I have at this moment? Did I decide it on the basis of understanding or on the basis of an assumption?
• Ensure that the feeling that I have at this moment is in line with the feeling of Relationship, Harmony, and Co-existence and not otherwise. On this basis, I will be in a state of harmony and happiness at this moment.

Once you practice this for a short duration then you can expand it and you can be aware of your thoughts every moment! Wherever you are and whatever you are doing, you can be mindful, which means you can be positive all the time, what do you say?

Practicing Gratitude also plays a vital role in developing a positive attitude! Acknowledging the good things in our life, no matter how small, shifts our focus from what we don’t have to what we have.

You can do one thing: write down just three things you were grateful for that day. It may be some big things like getting a new car, or small things like you didn’t spill milk while boiling it this morning, or had a good conversation with your friend. Make it a practice to say thanks to at least three people a day! Don’t forget to thank yourself! You may please read my previous blog on Gratitude – A Natural Happiness Dose https://spavai.com/gratitude-a-natural-happiness-dose/ .

The next important one we have to ensure is “Surround Yourself with Positivity”.

I hope you all agree with me on this, right?  You might have noticed that after spending time with a certain friend, you might have felt very low. I know one lady who would always be talking only about the negatives. Always complaining about others, talking ill about them, or her health problems. After some time, I started thinking about when she will leave(Sorry to say this!). Yes, the people you spend time with and the media you consume can significantly influence your mindset. (The local language serials, the best example of influencing in a negative way!) Avoid such negative people and spend more time with friends who are encouraging and positive. Surrounded by supportive and optimistic individuals and being mindful of content that leaves you feeling drained or negative will enhance the optimism in you! 

Yet another important strategy for developing a positive attitude is to ‘Focus on Solutions, Not Problems’.

My niece is living in a shared apartment, and she was complaining to me that she constantly finds the kitchen sink piled high with dirty dishes, often left by their roommates(!). I suggested to her that instead of just fuming, she could initiate a discussion with her roommates and make a schedule to clean the vessels on a rotation basis, or suggest setting a rule that everyone washes their dishes immediately after use. They might even explore more immediate solutions like keeping a small bin right next to the sink for food scraps to prevent clogging, making dishwashing less unpleasant.  

In this way, the focus shifts from simply being frustrated by the mess to actively finding and implementing practical ways to manage it within their shared living space. This is what we mean by focusing on solutions rather than on problems! What do you say, whether this will enhance our positivity?

Psychologists suggest engaging in positive self-talk, talking to yourself like you are a dear friend, replacing negative self-criticism with encouraging and affirming statements, will help to develop a positive attitude. Setting realistic goals(you may even break a larger goal into smaller ones), appreciating and celebrating small achievements(Oh, super, I made a good tea! – Have a small tea party for mastering a single new chord if your goal is to get better at playing the guitar!).

Developing a positive mindset is an ongoing journey, not a quick fix. By consistently incorporating these strategies into our daily lives, we can gradually train our brains to focus on the good, embrace challenges with greater resilience, and unlock the incredible power of positive thinking. 

A final word: Be Kind to Yourself! Cultivating a positive mindset takes time and effort. There will be days when negative thoughts creep in. Be patient and compassionate with yourself. Acknowledge the feeling without judgment and gently redirect your focus. I tell myself, “You’re a work in progress, not a finished product – and that’s okay!” and the same applies to you also!